a master's cry

08.08.08--I thought it was just another day for me. Aside from the usual not-having-a- goodnights sleep, i did not prepare for anything special this day. I was up every hour from 1 am til 3am and i talking to myself "matulog ka na! me trabaho ka pa!"..Well i guess after thinking about several plain white bondpapers, i did find my sleep but i know that i am half awake.

My mobilfone rang around 5.30 to 6 am and i was quite pissed because it was hell of a night for me, but anyway i still have to wake up to prepare for work. SO i took the fone and i was my sister in law with a very bad news for me. THe usual hi's and hello's and then straight to the matter. She just reported that my beloved dog Bjørn is in bad shape. Well, i was half asleep and half awake and i didnt quite realised the impact of how severe he was. She told me that my dog is in the clinic and on IVF because he has infection of heartworm. I am not familiar with the disease and i reacted just as it was a fever or the like..I told her that ask the Vets to do everything they can do and we hoped that Bjørn will be well.

So i hung up the phone went to the CR, did the morning rituals and headed to work. It was quite a busy morning for me. So many things to do at work but despite that, i remembered to put my mobilfone in my pocket just in case! coz i usually leave it in my bag coz it was quite heavy to have it in my pocket. Anyway..around 10am..my fone was ringing but i was too bz to answer it and it was not allowed to take calls while we are at work. But after a few minutes it rang again just as i was about to feed my patient, meaning iam inside her room and i can take the call. I took it and it was CJ. She said that she is with Bjørn right now and that he is trying to stand up despite how bad his situation is. I wanted to talk to my dog, i wanted him to hear me and tell him that i am here and that he should get well because i will see him when i have my vacation back in Alabang. Cj said that she cant because he is in a cage and it was quite difficult. So she talked about Bjørn, that he tried to response and stand up when he heard her voice but was too weak to even stand or bark. She elaborated more about his situation and explained to me what the vet said. And while all the talking was happening, she interrupted our conversation by saying "wala na si Bjørn"..

Hearing that for the first time she said it was unbelievable..maybe its just an initial reaction of humans to a negative situation..in denial..so i kept silent..and asked her again.."patay na si Bjørn?" she replied.."OO..sorry"...I was hurt, my heart broke..